The cast of the mainly consists of Joel, Eli, Josh, and Denise. Occasionally, other friends such as Allison and Alex join the podcast. The main cast does not consistently appear on the podcasts, due to different schedule conflicts (with Josh being the most frequent absentee).

Joel Real


Joel Watson - Joel is the writer & artist for HijiNKS ENSUE, as well as the leader of the podcast. Joel's voice can be identified as usually the first voice heard on the podcast, or at least the voice heard during the introductions at the beginning of the podcast. Joel is the only cast member to appear in every single podcast (mainly because his recording equipment is used, and his house serves as the location for the majority of the podcasts). In the early podcasts, Joel was heavily reliant on various imitations of movie and television characters. Some of his most famous voices from past and present include Tree Beard, Eli's Grandmother (Estel), Rambo, Obosby, As the podcast grew, Joel began to bring more structure to the podcast, and the voices faded away. Now Joel is one who consistently brings up the next topics for Internet and the questions for the Mail Sack.

Eli Real


Eli Luna - Eli operates the sound board for the HijiNKS ENSUE Podcast. Eli is Mexican, a point which is consistently mocked on the podcast. He also can not speak any Spanish, another point further mocked on the podcast. Eli is the most consistent member of the podcast, missing only a handful of episodes due to illness and work. His responsibilities with the soundboard sometimes lead him to not interject into conversations, except with random and mostly inappropriate sound effects. In fact, Joel once specified that Eli's job on the podcast was to disrupt the conversation. Eli loves going to cons, and often brings back reports from cons such as ALL Con, Dallas Con, Frightmare Weekend, and others. Eli has a tendency to quote Red October ("One ping Vasily") at random times. He also says one particular quote ("Hobbits, get off the road") any time Lord of the Rings is mentioned. He will also occasionally yell out "Mammy". Eli will sometimes join Joel in random voices with his Cloverfield voice (which is just the voice of a Frat Boy.
Josh Real


Josh - Josh fills out the third part of the original cast. While frequently absent or late, he still attends the podcast more frequently than Denise (the forth member of the main cast). Josh can quickly be identified with his higher pitched laughter, his sighs, or his use of, "Oh My God". Josh is gay, which is made fun of in almost every podcast, and loves bacon, which is also frequently mentioned. Joel will recall gay related and bacon related stories during the podcast for Josh to comment on (or simply to make fun of him). Josh can be blamed for the majority of the most offensive moments of the podcast, including but not limited to: the use of the n-word, saying that all blacks have Aids, the LOLcaust, Schindler's List the Musical, Tempura House, and various descriptions of sexual acts and terms that the cast does not want to or need to know. Josh is the most opinionated of any of the members of the cast, either absolutely loving a television show / film, loathing it, or being so uncaring towards it he will make snoring sounds while the other cast members discuss it.

Denise Real2


Denise - Denise was not part of the podcast officially until Episode 8 (she can be heard in the background of Episode 2), and did not consistently show up til Episode 14. Since then, she has been an extremely consistent member of the podcast. Although Josh has a better attendance record, Denise holds a better attendance for the last 45 podcasts than Josh. Denise is extremely quiet on the podcast, often only heard in background laughter. She is of Filipino descent, a point frequently mocked on the podcast. The entire cast will often rewrite her childhood and the history of the Philipines for comedic effect. Because of some unusual dishes served in the Philipines, she is also mocked anytime a weird food item is mentioned. Denise is an avid reader, and leads the HijiNKS ENUSE Book Club on the Fancy Bastard Forums. She will sometimes mention different books on the podcast, though the rest of the cast members will often not care or not comment.





Allison - Allison has appeared in a handful of early podcasts that were done during lunch (Episode 2 and Episode 7). She was also brought in during the first video cast in Episode 17, and replaced Josh in Episode 19. Allison has not been heard of since Episode 19. She works at Gearbox, moderating the community.

Alex - Alex appeared briefly in podcast 17, but was first officially on the podcast in Episode 47 replacing Josh. He appeared again in episodes 50, 52, and 55. Alex has always come in to replace Josh, which means that Alex and Josh have never been in the same podcast. Alex works with, and bears a striking resemblance to Eli (to which Joel has called him nega-Eli).

Joel Eli Josh Denise Allison Alex Original Cast Main Cast
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Total 55 53 43 38 3 5 14 25